Chapter 67

 Two months whizzed by, and suddenly we were in April. I couldn't even begin to understand where the past seven months had gone, and it was even harder to fathom that my due date was now only a month away. We had finished moving into the house and settled in quite happily. The biggest job of all had actually been to move James' “man cave” from the industrial building in Hammersmith to the warehouse we now had in our driveway. Leaving his old workshop had definitely been the most emotional for James, far more than moving from the house. The workshop meant a lot to him, it was his sanctuary, a place where he could sort out his thoughts and feelings, or forget the world outside. A place to relax and be himself, without any deadlines or expectations. The move hadn't been that easy on Fusker either, he had accepted it reluctantly but sometimes disappeared for days, and I was worried he was trying to find his way back “home”. My favourite room in the house had quickly become the study, where we had lined three of the walls with bookcases and filled them with books, vinyl albums, CD’s, photos and memories. The room held James' piano, and a few huge high-backed armchairs that I loved to curl up in and read, or listen to music or James playing. When spring neared I began pottering around the garden, trying to teach myself how to take care of plants, and failing most of the time. But as my stomach continued to grow I had to abandon that hobby when bending over plants and flowerbeds became difficult and uncomfortable.

Crawling into bed one evening I snuggled right up to James, as close as I could get with my now huge tummy in the way. I was warm as I had just gotten out of the bathtub and James groaned happily as I inched up to him, happy to feel my body and skin close to his. I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, wanting to sleep, trying to ignore my stiff back and the fact that I really had to pee again. After a long moment of silence James spoke.

“Emily?”
“Mm?” I mumbled drowsily.

“I don't want to go to France this weekend.”

“Oh, James, don't start this again...” I sighed. The plan was that James and his crew from Man Lab were to go to France to shoot a last sequence for the last episode of the season. “This might be the last chance you'll get to do any work in months, possibly years,” I added darkly.

“But... Will you even be all right on your own? I mean, you can barely put on your own shoes these days, and... You should be taking it easy. Its getting close, and...” he stammered.

“James! The due date is nearly a month away! And first-timers nearly always go over anyway! And I CAN put on my own shoes!” James just looked at with sad, almost pleading eyes. “James, sweetheart. I promise you, absolutely nothing will happen while you're away for three days. This baby is not going to be born while you're in France.”

“Promise?”

“I promise,” I smiled.

“So what are you going to do while I'm away?” He asked.

“I am going to lie in bed, watch TV and eat Ritz crackers with cream cheese.”

“I'm amazed you're not fed up with eating that yet,” James chuckled, shaking his head exasperatedly. I squeezed him a little, hugging him tight, realising that I was going to miss him a lot even if he was just gone for a few days. “Emily. Our son or daughter is punching me in the ribs,” he announced dryly. The nightly movements had become such a habit for me that I didn't even notice them any more.

“There is no point informing me about it, I already know that. You could try do something about it?”
“Me? What can I do about it? It lives inside you!” He argued back.

“Well, maybe you could try talking to him or her, maybe the sound of your voice will calm it down?” I suggested. James frowned, looking at me with incredulity, as if he really couldn't believe that I had just suggested that. Then he sighed, rolled his eyes and turned onto his side, inching down the bed until his head was level with my tummy. He sighed again, hesitating and looking a little uncomfortable. Apparently James found it absurd to try and talk to my midriff. He ran a hand over my stomach and cleared his throat before speaking softly.

“Um... Hello.” As he said this I couldn't help but laugh loudly. “What?!” James asked with raised eyebrows, looking up at me. “You have to start with hello!”

“Yes, yes, I know, honey,” I said, stifling a giggle and running a hand over his hair. With another sigh, James turned to my stomach again.

“So... Hello. I'm your.. dad.” At this there was a massive punch, so forceful I could see my stomach move. “I know, I'm sorry, I apologise in advance. But... See, I haven't done this before, and so... I don't know how to do it well. I don't like that, not knowing what to do. But I'll try to do my best...” As he spoke James ran his hand calmly over the unruly tummy, caressing the baby within. I watched him quietly as he spoke, running my hand over his hair. Nothing warmed my heart more than seeing James like this, being intimate and bonding with our baby. “I know its probably getting a bit incommodious in there, but do you think you could maybe stop moving around so much? Your mummy can't sleep when you do that, you see... And I can tell that she is really tired right now and really needs her sleep. You should try to be nice to your mummy, because she's the most amazing person in the entire world. You are very lucky to get her for a mum, you know. And I'm even luckier to have her, and that she wants to be with me, because she is the love of my life.”

“I think its working...” I whispered, desperately trying to blink back the emotional tears that were welling up in my eyes. It was indeed working, there was definitely less movement and kicking going on.

“All right, so... In a few days, I have to go away for a little while. I won't be gone for long, but I would really appreciate if you stayed in there until I get back. Because I would really like to be there when you're born, I'm not sure I could forgive myself if I wasn't.”

“Keep going,” I prompted. Having run out of things to say, James began singing quietly in stead. It took a while before I recognised it as some old serenade by Thomas Campion that James sometimes hummed to himself, which almost made me laugh again. But James had a good voice, calm and steady, and it wasn't long until the baby's movements had stilled.

“I.. think it worked,” James whispered as he looked up at me, eyes wide with surprise. Carefully, as if to not wake the baby, he inched his way up the bed again. Resting his head on the pillow he looked at me, looking a little proud of himself.

“You did it, dad!” I cheered in a subdued whisper, running my hand over his back.

“I probably bored it to sleep with my talking...” He giggled, still whispering.

“Whatever works, really,” I shrugged, and we both chuckled quietly. James turned over on his back, pulling me close.

“All right, I guess I'll go to France,” he sighed.

“Good spaniel,” I murmured sleepily, caressing his chest with a heavy hand.

After much fuss and mild arguments I managed to shoo James firmly out of the house on Thursday around noon. When he had left I had a cup of tea then began on the task I had set myself for the weekend, which was to launder all the smallest baby-clothes we had, and put them in the dresser in the nursery. I enjoyed doing these things, all these little preparations made me feel a little bit more ready for what was coming. Most of what we needed were in place by now; the nursery now held a dresser, a rocking chair, a brand new pram and car seat along with a bookshelf that was already bursting with toys and books. In the bathroom was a changer and diaper bin in the bathroom. After some mild persuasion I had managed to get James to agree to a “baby hammock”, which was now hanging from the ceiling in the living room. We had also 'inherited' a lot of things from the Hammonds. Mindy was so excited about the baby that she'd in her eagerness gone through all of the things they had from when the girls were babies, and had come bearing bags and bags of stuff; a play-mat, toys, rattlers, bed linen and neutral baby-clothes. She had another few bags of clothes ready if it turned out to be a girl. I was incredibly grateful for all of it.

Precisely two minutes after I wallowed onto the sofa with a blanket, there was a knock on the front door. I swore loudly and flailed about, trying to heave myself out of the sofa again.

“Yeah yeah, I'm coming, in about twenty minutes or so... Have patience!” I shouted, finally managing to get myself vertical. Clutching at my increasingly aching back I waddled over to the front door. “Richard! Hello! Sorry for making you wait, I just can't get out of the sofa without a winch,” I apologised.

“Hello! I was in the neighbourhood, sort of, so I thought I'd stop by,” he said airily. I frowned, narrowing my eyes a little as I studied him.

“James sent you, didn't he.”

“Yes. Yes he did,” Richard admitted immediately. I couldn't help but laugh as he hung his head in shame for having been found out so quickly.

“Well, if you fancy staying for a bit my plan for the afternoon was pizza and a Lord of the Rings marathon,” I said, taking a step back to let him in.

“God, you are such a geek. But, sure,” he nodded, coming inside and closing the door behind him. “I talked to James on the phone, he was fussing about you, I said I was staying in London until tomorrow and offered to drop by.” I waddled back to the sofa and slumped back onto it, Richard trailing behind me.

“Oh god, what was he fussing about now?” I sighed.

“What wasn't he fussing about, more like! Worried you didn't have enough food in the house so you'd have to go out shopping, or that you were doing too much around the house...” He rambled as he sank down in the armchair opposite.

“He is going to worry himself into a heart attack soon,” I groaned. “The other day the baby had the hiccups, I thought James was going to have a stroke!” At this Richard laughed, then pulled a sympathetic face.

“Aaaw, poor man. But I can understand him, I remember how it was before my oldest was born, I was a constant ball of anxiety. And James is so much more of a worrier than me,” Richard mused.

“Exactly.”

“He was genuinely worried you wouldn't get your shoes on by yourself...” He said, trying to hide a chuckle.

“I can put my own shoes on!” I shouted, more frustrated with James than Richard. “Well, probably not if they have laces, actually...” I admitted, staring down at my enormous stomach.

“On a scale of one to ten, how fed up are you with being pregnant right now?” He asked knowingly.

“A hundred million!” I said matter of factly. “Part of me is very done with being pregnant by now. I am particularly tired of having this baby's arse wedged up against my ribs!” Feeling uncomfortable I nudged and pushed on the top of my bump, trying to get the baby to shift a little. Richard pulled a face.

“You know, I am very glad I won't ever have to be pregnant,” he confided.

“But then again, I don't mind if it stays in there for another month, I'm not sure I'm ready for it to come out just yet. Anyway, I was going to order pizza. Sound ok?” After having gotten our food we settled down for the first film. I kept squirming and shifting on the couch, unable to get comfortable, feeling a lot more smothered than usual. It was as if the baby had its arms and legs stretched out it front of it, pushing all it could. With a sigh I got out of the sofa. “Bathroom. Again. Be right back.” It took nearly 20 minutes before I returned to the living room.

“There you are! I was wondering if you'd fallen in!” Richard giggled.

“With this thing? Hardly likely,” I grumbled, gesturing to my waist. “Listen, I was wondering if you could do me a little favour...?” I asked, gingerly sitting down on the armrest of the sofa. Richard took his eyes off the film again, facing me.

“Sure, of course I will, love. Anything. What?”

“I was wondering if maybe you wouldn't mind driving me to the hospital in a bit..”

“The hospital?” He frowned. “Did they call? I thought you stopped working over a month ago? You can't work like that? You're not going to work, are you?”

“Nooo....” I said firmly, waiting for him to catch on.

“But then wh-- Oh... OH! No..?! No? Now?” His eyes widened

“Well, my water sort of broke. A bit. Ten minutes ago. So... Yes, I guess,” I shrugged apologetically.

“Wow. Bloody hell,” he mumbled, getting up and walking over to me, placing his hand on my shoulder. “You all right?”

“Don't look at me like that, if you do I am going to have a panic attack,” I said with a smile, needing to make a joke out of it for now. “Listen, I need to go pack... stuff...”

“Pack? You haven't packed yet?”

“No I haven't! I haven’t packed as much as a diaper! This baby wasn't supposed to come for another month, of course I haven't packed!”

“All right, all right,” he said soothingly, trying to calm me down. “Need some help?”

“Um no, I... I need you to call James. Could you do that? I don't know if I could deal with that right now.”

“Okay, I'll do that, you go pack.”

As Emily waddled off to pack Richard watched her, shaking his head slightly. His heart rate had gone up a little, but nowhere near as badly as it had been when his own children had been about to be born. Maybe that was why he wasn't panicking this time, he had done this before, he felt he was a little experienced. Pulling out his phone he scrolled through his contact list and found James' number. This wasn't a phone call he looked forward to making, he knew that these news would completely unbalance James. It rang for a long time, and Richard had just been about to give up when James picked up. There was a lot of background noise on the other end, chattering and laughter and music.

“Hello, Hamster! Whats up?” James answered. Richard felt how his heart sank.

“Oooh god, you're drunk, aren't you?” He said in a resigned voice.

“No, no, just a bit... inebriated. 'mfine. Are you with Emily?”

“Yes, that was why I was calling...-” Richard began.

“Oh god, is she okay?”

“Yeah yeah, she's fine, James, but... Her water just broke. You better come home, mate.”

“WHAT?!”James shouted shrilly.

“James, mate, listen to me, don't panic! Just.. focus on try and finding a way to get home. Quickly. Okay?”

“But... the due date is a month away!” James protested.

“It seems neither you nor Emily have picked up on the fact that babies don't care about due-dates. When they want out, they come out, thats just the way it is,” Richard said sagely.

“But.. I'm too drunk for this!” James complained.

“I know that!” Richard replied, unable to stop himself from laughing. “Just get to London, one way or another, okay? I'll call you later, keep you updated.”

“Say hi to Emily, yeah? Tell her I'll be home as soon as I can.”

“Emily? You okay? I talked to James, he'll try to find a way to get home as soon as he can. He says hi...” Richard spoke loudly as he walked through the house looking for me. He found me sitting on the edge of the bed with an open bag next to me, clutching a pair of jogging bottoms. “Emily?”

“Yeah? Oh, good. Thanks,” I mumbled.

“Done packing?”

“No... I... I know I printed out a list once, things to bring to the hospital, but I can't find it,” I complained, looking up at Richard with despair in my eyes. “We are the worst prepared parents in the universe! I haven't packed a bag, I don't even have a list of what to pack, and the dad is in another country!”

“Oh quit your wailing, I'll help you pack,” Richard said calmly, refusing to give my rising level of panic any attention. Sitting on my bed he calmly commanded me around, reminding me to pack things like comfy clothes, chargers, slippers, my camera and toiletries. When he mentioned nursing bras and pads I broke out laughing at the absurdity of it. “What? I've done this twice!” He argued. “Well, technically I haven't, but I helped. Sort of.” My laughter got stuck in my throat when the first contraction hit. I didn't say anything, I just screwed up my face and held my breath until it was over. “Don't forget to breathe through those or you'll pass out,” Richard observed, annoyingly calm as ever.

Locking the door behind me I eyed Richards car.

“Oh god, couldn't it have been a Land Rover,” I sighed, staring at the Porsche in the driveway.

“Whats wrong with it?”

“I'm the size of a hippo, Hammond. You might have to strap me to the roof.” Richard laughed loudly as he opened the car door for me. With difficulty, and rather ungracefully, I managed to fold myself into the front seat while Richard headed for the driver's side. He banged the door shut, put on his belt then looked me up and down.

“Ready to go?” He asked. He looked a little tense and worried.

“No. But I guess I have to. And relax, I won't ruin your seat,” I added.

“My seat..?” He frowned, looked down at the seat and up again.

“I am wearing one of my child's diapers, if you must know!”

“I didn't want to know that, no...” Richard mumbled, shaking his head.

“Just.. go...” I squeaked.